This Issue at a Glance

For this issue we have a tremendous amount of articles, but one of our highlights would be the "Power in RuneScape" written by Merch Gwyar. The article contains fascinating results and information on the power and 'food-chain' in the game of RuneScape. From being powerful on the Sal's Forums and receiving a rank in the game of RuneScape, it includes information on becoming a ranked official in RuneScape (and on Sal's) and it also includes quotes from the ranked officials.

Moreover, we are proud to present the winners of the "Mod for a Day" competition that took place over the last month. Chairman of the competition Jamster received a surplus amount of messages in his inbox the past month containing stories on what you would do if you were a moderator for a day. Our newspaper staff had fun judging all entries, and we give out a 'thanks' to all participants and a 'congratz' to our winners.

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Quotes of the Month

Maniackid55: My neighbors would probably call the cops if I went up to their door and took pictures. No seriously.
Matt T: Um, ever heard of zoom lenses?

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Evin290: Marriage should be a question of love, not a question of gender.
00 Jack 00: Word

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I know a couple of people my age who have lost their virginity at 13. Most of them are girl S**ts doing it with some older guy. Unfortunatly, that group includes my X girlfriend - Mat Bateman2

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oma (o my allah and no i am NOT islamic, in fact my namee is the complete oppposite) this looks like funw00t - Noseonarug17

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unfortunately i lost mine [virginity] to the wrong person then she went out with my uncle instead yuck!!! but at least i was 19 and most of you...not all are from america where it is legal after 18, it is legal after the age of 16 here in the uk, 18 when its a man with another man, 2 females on the other hand can do it at any age. - stratosph3r3

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I'm thinking about changing my name to Tinkerbell. - Po22

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I need two super trustworthy substitutes that will be there if I go camping, get kidnapped, or shipped to Cuba accidentally. You never know. - Po22

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I'm sure that if I walked into school wearing "Sals rules!" lingerie on, I would be laughed at. Come to that, I was laughed at when I went in wearing normal lingerie. - dawesbr

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There are so many historical scientific proves that jezus exised that god doesn't have to come bye, and say hi - Underground

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Bub 5000: The only reason I don't like them [Incandescent Light Bulbs] is because they give off radiation. I don't want to have to wear sun screen indoors to protect myself from their rays.
Wilbur: pretty sure the whole idea of light is that it radiates

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Everythings wrong with it. Its Canadian. - Zephyr 2755

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X onyxia X is a guy, and she is from runescape community... - Barrower

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b) I go utterly insane and sit in the middle of the dungeon with my pants on my head, two pencils up my nose, going 'wibble, wibble, wibble'. - Merch Gwyar

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Boonader93: I Had Like 10 Clue Scoll And I Boonader: Never Knew What They Did!!!
This post has been edited by Flummoxer - Reason for edit: That's wonderful! Too bad it is pretty offtopic as well.

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dawesbr: Funny, sexist, crude. Now, who does this remind me of...
Jamster: Mrcsupertrain?
Rory I: What about George Bush?
Jamster: Didn't you know? They're the same person

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You didn't have no life, you just didn't pay no attention. - Second Chance

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I heard you need 99 agility to beta test the new French Runescape. - Arianna

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I always thought the definition was luring if it happened to you, dragging if it happened to another person - Wiltingplant

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Scooby: It's a saradomin stole, it's a treasure trail item too. Requires 60 prayer to wear.
Ghost 1494: i see you every where scooby are you like always on sal's?
The Jamo: he is sal's.

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A member a day keeps the disbanding away - Clan Odyssey

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Yesterday was my birthday. I liked it, surprisingly. I didnt really do anything for it, although I might do something later in the week, such as a party, if I do have it, it'll only be for the possibility of sex. - Freegro's Blog - titled "Birthday"

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Da Scotsman: Try and keep your warm level down (even getting it into minus numbers if you can)
Arianna: Yep, you need to be at least around -15°C to become a DM.

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Venom: 20,000 - Super Steve! [Suggestion for New Forum Post Ranks]
Say Topdog: Probably not? I think it was set up to be runescape related.
Venom: Ihavenosenseofhumor - Say Topdog

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Yeah my list! Woooo!! Party! We are all going to Mrcsupertrains house to have a rave. I'll get the iPod, someone get the weed, 123man is the only one who can buy alcohol legally, let's get it crackin. - Po22

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Arianna: On a serious note, not only this is not allowed, but I'd like to know the reason(s) why. It's not as if we draw random numbers and promote the correspondent member.
Doddsy: It isn't, I have no hope now
Arianna: Effectively pwnd

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Scary Pudding: But you're a newbie.
Po22: Philisophically, aren't we all? The earth itself is young, a marble spinning, galaxies upon galaxies dwarfing even the biggest thing imaginable?
Gillis:

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Scary Pudding: But you're a newbie.
Po22: Philisophically, aren't we all? The earth itself is young, a marble spinning, galaxies upon galaxies dwarfing even the biggest thing imaginable?
Toungy: So... Sal's is a metaphor for the galaxy?

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Po22: Hey now why is it disgusting? Why can't we all just go to a field together somewhere naked and all just masturbate?
Big Tree: Why must it be me who has detailed mind-pictures of events like those...? Depends on the field, in all honesty...

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exonius champoin of lite: duh abortion is kiling inocent babies and al gore wants to kil the babies in abortion
Scary Pudding: He wants to make it legal, that doesn't mean he's going to walk around with a knife and slice the stomach of every pregnant woman he sees.

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[Talking about Jimi Hendrix playing Guitar Hero] Kidding? He'd totally set the whole PS set on fire and light at least ten joints on it, all of it while having wild sex with at least 128 fans. At once. - Arianna

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I am experienced enough to do a Horoscope. All you have to do is sound vague and mystical. In other words, I'm a pretty good lier. - Po22

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Back when there was a pking wilderness and before the home teleport, I used to give free trips to Lumbridge. - Agent F

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The Plopper: Hello. I support Ron Paul in the 2008 election. I am a fan of the color "yelo". I think Steve is a fat guys name. Can I join/plzzzzzzz?????
Flummoxer: steve no fat,, he big boned

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if anyone here thinks that the people who run runescape should split runescape in half,and we all have eternal battle over each other say HUBABUBALY - Stink5000

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Life at the Realm

• There are about 17,300 members now registered at Sal's Realm, 2,700 less since last issue, with over 2,200,000 created posts.
• After four months of unusual waiting, the distinguished members finally nominated two new members to their group: Lilshu and SlashingUk. Congratulations gentlemen and enjoy your new color.
• Congratulations to Cxkslei, Druin, Hawk, HotBabe69, Matt T, Synapsi, Wiltingplant, and Young on becoming the newest moderators of the Sal's Realm Clan Chat on RuneScape.
• Since the last paper was released, some new guides have been added to the site. Check them out so the authors feel special: Scabaras Research, Duel Arena, H.A.M. Dungeon, As a First Resort, The Digsite, Edgeville, Enakhra's Lament, Catapult Construction, Gravestone Guide, and Etceteria & Miscellania. Great job on all the guides, authors.
• The Forum Rules received an update in late January, so make sure you find the time to read them.
• The Graphic Boards obtained a real nice and improved update. Check them out and see all the changes.
• The Highscores have returned to the forums, so enter your name to see where you rank in RuneScape.

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Mod For a Day

Members were invited to write about what they would do if they were a moderator for a day. Jamster gets in depth into the contest while the newspaper staff had the last say on who won. Find out by clicking on the 'Forum & Site Discussion' link under the site menu.

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